October 29, 2012

• Always

  
  

  You do what you are told. It's what you've always done. Because it's safe and because it's right. To do what others deem correct and necessary. You always dress correctly, always say the right thing. Or say nothing at all. You never go out of your way to do anything bold, anything unconventional...lest you be ridiculed. By whom I must ask. You never do anything wild or crazy. It's not right you don't think. But you want life. You want love. Or so you say from the depths of the safe and placid chains you've wrapped around yourself, more boring than exposed brick.

  Did you know I detest everything about you? You're a good person, wrapping that goodness around yourself like a second skin, never ever letting yourself go wrong. Rigid. You're everything I've always feared and hated. You're conventional like plaid and argyle could never be. When will you realize the hand that you hold is the hand that holds you down? Will you ever realize the very things you do is keeping you from the very things you want? The things you've done have led you to be where you are. Unless you like the dry cell that you've built for yourself, do something different. Live. Not just survive. Not just a muted excuse of a person. Live.

  I've never thought of myself as a truly good person. I'm selfish, ruthless, stubborn, indulgent, decadent. But I've laughed until I cried. I cried, bawled, hiccuped and then laughed until I cried some more. I've always had a hard time doing what I've been told to do, other people's opinions are not my own. I live. Because I dare to. I let people in. And I kick people out. I've loved and been loved in return. I scream. I rage. I hop on one foot and then the other at inappropriate times. I'm highly inappropriate many times. Screw convention. I've only got one life, one moment and many chances.

  
  —  G

  • 11:24 pm
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